Murphy spoke the truth. He indeed is not left handed. His newly displayed skills with the blade is dazzling and it takes every ounce of skill and training I have to avoid a fatal strike.
The last two mods didn't work out as planned and cost me more time than I wanted. I also am missing parts that I had planned on to get to 32. I must therefore find other things to achive the win. At this point my car was still mostly in pieces (some of the pictures above with everything assembled were taken post mortem) so I decide the best course of action will be to start putting the car back together and see if inspiration strikes.
It is at this point that I initiate a conversation in the midst of clashing steel.
Me: "You're amazing!"
Murphy:"I ought to be after fourty years."
Me:"There's something I ought to tell you."
Murphy:"Tell me."
Me:"I am not left-handed either."
After finishing installing the controller here is what I notice:
Holy crap I need some sleep. I also need a beer:
If the rest of my meth kit would have showed I’d be at 32 already but as it sits I need a few more and I’m out of parts that I have the energy to install, and ideas as well.
If you haven’t noticed, I’m a very creative person. Inspiration strikes me a lot, and I’m always thinking about something I could do, change, or improve (this in pretty much all settings, work, home, school, etc.). I start putting my car back together and trust that inspiration will strike as I go. It does. I knock Murphy out for good with the but of my sword.
Mod #30: UTEC and Wideband Serial Cable Passthrough
Pretty simple really, but normally you have to hide the wires somewhere weird. This gives me quick access to tuning the ECU.
Mod #31 - Long hosed Methanol Funnel
You can, of course, buy things like this. You're not me with stuff lying around to make something out of and a modification # goal. This one counts as a mod even though it's not on the car because I won't exactly be using this to pour my kids milk through.
Step 1: Cut up old funnel you haven't used in years.
Step 2: Insert leftover rubber heater hose.
Step 3: Grab new tube of silicon sealant from the household chemicals section of your basement tool room.
Step 4: Avoid Murphy's desperate and juvenille effort to screw up your day when your $2 caulking gun breaks, goes in too far, and tries to shoot the glue all over you.
Step 5: Use the glue to seal the tubing to the funnel.
Step 6: Tape with gorilla tape just for good measure.
Step 7: Set funnel in your new methanol mixing station.
Step 8: Profit!
I am at 31 Mods. Murphy was beaten and knew it. He had only one option left: a death by papercuts strategy. Those always fail against the likes of me Murph. Always.
My BPV gasket looks bad. I have RTV Copper:
My nice, solid, aluminum intercooler spacer is missing. I have washers:
One of the clear hoses I cut earlier isn't up to the job. I have 1/2 inch heater hose:
The 1/2 inch hose is too big for the Catch Can. I have duct tape.
And finally, I can't just have the meth system loose in my car spraying all over the engine bay. I have zip ties:
Me: “Hey Murphy, you there man?
Murphy: [groans softly] “I can has chesburger? Ugh. My head hurts…”
Me: “Sorry to hear that. Maybe this will cheer you up: I’ve got a joke for you.”
Murphy: [whimpers] “Go ahead.”
Me: “What did the five fingers say to the face?”
Murphy: “I don’t know, what?”
[violently jerks hand down from the ready position and connects with Murphy]
Me: “SLAP!!!!”
Mod #32: Toddler Car-Seat Protection Pad
My car is completely back together. It's 4:45am. The only time I've been more tired than this was after the birth of my son. Murphy's unconcoius body is laying at my feet, but I need one more mod to finish him off for good. I realize at this point that I still need to re-install my sons carseat.
I've always hated these stupid things but I now appreciate their utility. They actually mark the location of the car seat buckle.
I notice that there is an impression in the seat from being secured for so long. Inspiration strikes, and like a light from the heavens the way is clear to my 32nd and final mod thereby completing the galactic connection that leads to a truely epic level of win.
I run into my basement and grab a foam mat from the workout room, then grab a knife...
I AM DONE!
ALL 32 MODS!!!
I AM ALL THAT IS MAN!!!!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment